Two-Faced

I've decided that I am quite tired of people being two-faced. I think all this really shows is cowardliness.

Examples? Of course I have examples.

1. "I went to Costco today."
"Oh! I've never been there. I would love to see it sometime."
"Oh! I'll call you the next time we are planning on going. You can come with us to check it out."

Three weeks pass.

"I went to Costco today."
"Oh. I thought you were going to tell me so I could go along."
"Uh. Well I had to stop somewhere else, and I needed to be home at a certain time, and I had to drop something off somewhere, and I didn't know exactly what time we were leaving....."

This shows that the earlier invitation to Costco was made out of sympathy, but with no real intent to back it up. Guess what -- I have lived 34 years of my life without being in Costco. I am fairly certain that an empty invitation was not necessary in order for me to continue living not knowing about the greatness of such a place.

2. "Hey, I'd love to get together sometime; our kids would probably love playing."
"Ok. I have nothing planned for most of this week and could come over anyday, or you could come over here, or we could just meet at a park or something."

No phone calls the rest of the week. Next meeting:

"I was waiting for you to call last week. We had nothing to do and Sarah was begging to play with ."
"Oh, well had a cold one day, and then we had to go grocery shopping, and I decided to go to the outlet mall in Oshkosh and found the GREATEST deal on kids jackets! I just forgot."

For a whole week? I live 10 blocks away from you. Its not possible that you ever drove past my house and thought, "Oh that's right -- our kids wanted to get together." Well, guess what again -- if I had not been banking on your (empty) promise of getting together I would have PLANNED something else to do. But, not wanting to offend you or having to blow you off when I had previously claimed to be free all week, I waited to schedule with you before planning anything else.

3. "It would be great to get together and talk sometime. Let's do it when our husbands are home so we can be kidless."
"Sounds great. Steve works this week Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, but I think any other day should be good."
"Ok, I'll check 's schedule and let you know a good time for me."

Week passes.

"Hey I was waiting to hear from you about getting together."
"Oh I didn't know your schedule and waiting for you to call me."

Well most people have known me long enough, and well enough, to know that when Steve is working -- he is GONE for 24 hours, but is otherwise home and available to stay with the kids. My schedule is not a difficult thing to figure out in advance. In fact, I can tell you when I will have days free around Christmas because I know that Steve will be working the day before and the day after, but will have off Christmas Day. I am not the one who is unable to plan things in advance. If you do not want to get together to "talk", then don't say you want to.

Basically if you don't want to see me, then don't say you do. You are not going to break my heart. I am grown up enough to know that not everyone can be the best of friends with everyone else all the time. To me, a sign of true friendship is following through with plans or intents, and is telling someone flat-out when you don't have time or ambition to "hook up" this week.

I have grown very frustrated with people who call themselves adults yet do not have the GUTS to act like one when dealing with other people.